Facebook Temporarily Denies Access to Users with Invalid Names

Users whose names don’t meet Facebook’s guidelines are being temporarily denied access to their accounts. Upon logging in, these users are warned to change to a full first and last name without special characters or punctuation. If they provide an invalid name, they’re prevented from viewing their news feed, communicating with other users, or even deactivating their account for a number of hours. This aggressive move should eradicate irregular names on Facebook, promoting authentic identity but potentially angering or driving some users away from the site.

A month ago, Facebook began asking users to use their real name in only one language with a full first and last name and without special characters such as ♥, ☮, or Ⓥ. Facebook explained that this was to “reduce spam and increase authenticity”, but many affected users felt it was unfair to force them to strip away symbols used to denote affiliation with causes or ideologies, such as Ⓥ for veganism or voluntaryism.

In Facebook’s view, when users are tied to their real name and identity, they’re less likely to practice abusive or disruptive behavior. By only having real names on the site, Facebook could power future online identity systems which could become a lucrative business. However, Facebook has allowed irregular names until now, meaning some have become accustomed to this form of expression and are reluctant to change.

Now when users without valid names log in to Facebook, they’re brought to the URL http://www.Facebook.com/Checkpoint. Under the header “Please Update Your Name on Facebook” they see a warning stating “If you enter an invalid name your account will be inaccessible for [#] hours before your next opportunity to update your name.” The number of hours number reportedly increases from one to two hours to four hours, and possibly longer if the user repeatedly refuses to comply.
Users are shown first, middle(optional), and last names entry fields which they can use to update their name. If the user enters a valid name, they’re given normal access to their account. If they enter the same invalid name they’ve been using or another name that fails to meet the guidelines, they’re shown an “Account Inaccessible for [#] Hours” page explaining “Your account is temporarily unavailable because of repeated attempts to enter an invalid name.” They’re told to enter a valid name when they regain access.

Users with unusual legal names, such as those which umlauts or other special characters, could be erroneously prompted to change their names. The move could also stamp out some emergent behavior, such as users changing their name on Facebook while searching for a job to keep hirers from finding their profile, or users putting special characters in front of their names so they appear at the top of search results.
Facebook could merely be trying to clean up the site. However, the stern approach may be to speed preparations for an upcoming feature or integration which requires authentic identity.

Billionaires Who Started With Nothing

George Joseph, Net worth: $1 billion

Age: 89
Schooling: Bachelor's degree, Harvard University
Hometown: Beckley, W. Va.
Money made: Insurance
Best-known venture:Mercury General

Born to a Lebanese restaurateur in West Virginia, George Joseph flew a B-17 in World War II and returned home to earn a degree at Harvard University on the GI Bill. When he graduated, he started working for
 Occidental Lifeas a systems analyst by day and an insurance salesman by night. "I learned a lot about the insurance business during this time and it opened my eyes to some opportunities in other areas," says Joseph. He applied what he had learned to a new model of selling auto insurance that covered all risk areas. He founded Mercury General (MCY) in 1962 and built the Los Angeles-based insurer into a company with 2009 revenues of $3.1 billion.

Howard Schultz, Net worth: $1.1 billion

Age: 57
Schooling: Bachelor's degree, Northern Michigan University
Hometown: Brooklyn, N.Y.
Money made: Copies and coffee
Best-known venture:Starbucks

Howard Schultz grew up in a Brooklyn housing project, where his father worked from one blue collar job to the next. After attending college on a football scholarship, Schultz worked at Xerox (
XRX) and in 1979 became general manager for Swedish drip coffee maker Hammarplast. This led him to a small Seattle chain called Starbucks Coffee Co. In 1987 he acquired the company's retail unit for $3.8 million. Today Starbucks (SBUX) operates more than 17,000 stores in almost 49 countries, generating more than $10.7 billion in 2010 revenues. Schultz told Portfolio.com in 2008 that his decision to provide health insurance to employees who work more than 20 hours a week was due to a period of time his father spent laid-up with a broken ankle. When Schultz was named a recipient of the Horatio Alger Award, he told the Horatio Alger Assn. that his parents were essentially "working poor" who had been unable to live the American Dream. "My story is as much one of perseverance and drive as it is of talent and luck. I willed my dreams to come true," Schultz said.

Kenny Troutt, Net worth: $1.1 billion

Age: 62
Schooling: Bachelor's degree, Southern Illinois University
Hometown: Mt. Vernon, Ill.
Money made: Telecom
Best-known venture: Excel Communications

The son of a bartender, Kenny Trout grew up in Mt. Vernon, Ill. He sold insurance to get through Southern Illinois University. In 1988, Troutt founded Excel Communications, a company that grew to be the fourth-largest long distance carrier in the country in just seven years. Troutt retired in 1999 and turned some of his attention to racehorses. This year his horse, Super Saver, won the 136th Kentucky Derby.
Ken Langone, Net worth: $1.1 billion

Age: 75
Schooling: BA, Bucknell University; MBA, New York University
Hometown: Roslyn Heights, N.Y.
Money made: Investing
Best-known venture: Home Depot

Born to a plumber and a cafeteria worker in Roslyn Heights, N.Y., Kenneth Langone dug ditches and worked as a caddy while at Bucknell University. To help pay for school, his parents mortgaged their home. Langone later earned an MBA at New York University on a part-time basis. His first fortune came in 1968, when he partnered with Ross Perot to take Electronic Data Systems (HP) public. In the 1970s he teamed with Bernard Marcus to start Home Depot (HD), which they eventually took public in 1981. Langone hasn't kept the rewards all to himself: In 1999—and again in 2008—he reportedly gave New York University separate gifts of $100 million.



Alan Gerry, Net worth: $1.15 billion


Age: 81
Schooling: Dropped out of high school
Hometown: Liberty, N.Y.
Money made: Cable TV
Best-known venture: Cablevision Industries

The son of Russian immigrants, Gerry dropped out of high school to join the Marines. He started a tiny television repair business after training via the G.I. Bill. In 1956, starting with $1,500 saved from his business, Gerry borrowed $20,000 to create a cable company and worked from the ground up, borrowing carefully without equity partners or initial stock offerings. By the time he sold to Time Warner Cable (TWC) in 1996, Cablevision Industries had become the country's eighth-largest cable provider, with 2,500 employees and 1.3 million subscribers. "We were filling a need," Gerry says. "People were so hungry for television."



Carl Berg, Net worth: $1.3 billion


Age: 73
Schooling: B.A. University of New Mexico
Hometown: Tucumcari, N.M.
Money made: Real estate and venture capital
Most well-known venture: Mission West Properties
At the age of 10, Carl Berg's father died and his schoolteacher mother was left to raise him alone in rural New Mexico. To pay his way through college, Berg repaired vending machines at day and worked as a clerk at what Berg called "the best hotel in town" at night. Berg took the hotel job with the goal of meeting someone that would give him a job in investment banking. "My theory worked fine," Berg says and explained that he eventually approached a regular who turned out to be the largest home builder in the country. The man offered Berg a job in the local office. "I would call all the time and raise hell about way they were running the home office," Berg says. "When I got ready to graduate college, he said 'Berg, if you're ready, you can come run the mortgage company.'" Eventually, Berg used the skills he learned in the mortgage business to make a real estate fortune in Silicon Valley. From there, he branched out into venture capital, a business he continues today. "The way I'm approaching it is, I'm trying to give someone else the opportunity that I had," Berg says. "I do everything I can to make the company succeed." Today, Berg is chairman and chief executive of Cupertino (Calif.)-based Mission West Properties (MSW), a giant real estate investment trust.



Stephen Bisciotti, Net worth: $1.3 billion


Age: 50
Schooling: Bachelor's degree, Salisbury State University
Hometown: Severna Park, Md.
Money made: Staffing
Best-known venture: Allegis Group

Stephen Bisciotti's father died when Bisciotti was just eight years old, leaving his mother to raise three children alone. Bisciotti worked his way through school and went into the temporary help business after graduating from Salisbury State in Maryland. At 23, Bisciotti and his cousin founded a high-tech temp agency in a basement office; sales reached $1.5 million in the first year. He built that company into
 Allegis Group, now among the nation's top staffing firms, and stayed true to his Maryland roots in 2004, when he bought the Baltimore Ravens National Football League team.



Leon Charney, Net worth: $1.3 billion


Age: 72
Schooling: BA, Yeshiva University; law degree, Brooklyn Law School
Hometown: Bayonne, N.J.
Money made: Real estate
Best-known venture: L.H. Charney Associates

Leon Charney made more than a billion dollars from real estate investments, especially in properties around Manhattan's Times Square.
 The Leon Charney Report, his weekly cable TV show, states that his "rise to international prominence is a classic 'American Dream' story." Charney started amid humble beginnings as the child of immigrant parents. His father's death while Charney was young left the family destitute. Charney worked his way through college and law school, singing at times for money. (He still serves as a cantor.) With $200 in the bank, he started a law firm and first came to prominence advising President Jimmy Carter on the 1978 Camp David Accords.



Thomas Peterffy, Net worth: $1.4 billion


Age: 65
Schooling: Dropped out of engineering studies to immigrate from Hungary
Hometown: Budapest
Money made: Brokerage firm
Best-known venture: Interactive Brokers Group

Born in Budapest during a 1944 Russian bombing raid, Thomas Peterffy moved to New York in 1965 as a refugee from Communist Hungary. He spoke no English when he arrived, then found a job as a draftsman. At night he taught himself computer programming. In 1977, Peterffy bought a seat on the American Stock Exchange and shocked traders in the early 80s when he brought an early handheld computer to the floor. The company that eventually grew out of that seat on the AMEX became
 Interactive Brokers Group, now known as IBG. According to a November 2005 profile in Institutional Investor, Peterffy wrote computer code in his head while trading during the day, then went back to the office to apply computer models to trading. The early use of computers made him a pioneer in the field. Today the company's website claims it logs more than a million trades per day.



Alec Gores, Net worth: $1.7 billion


Age: 57
Schooling: Bachelor's degree, Western Michigan University
Hometown: Nazareth, Israel
Wealth from: Leveraged buyouts
Best-known venture: Gores Group

Raised in Nazareth, Israel, Alec Gores moved with his family to Flint, Mich., at the age of 15. Members of his extended family were in the area and he worked at everything from stocking shelves to being a butcher at his uncle's grocery store while obtaining computer science and math degrees at Western Michigan University. On graduating, Gores started a company to sell software and hardware to small and midsized businesses. After selling it to Continental Telephone in the early 1980s, he realized he no longer wanted to start businesses from scratch, so he started buying promising companies he believed were underperforming. Today, with $2.7 billion under management,
 Gores Group has acquired more than 80 companies since 1987 in the areas of industrial equipment, technology, telecommunications, health care, and business services.



Carl Lindner Jr., Net worth: $1.7 billion


Age: 91
Schooling: Dropped out of school at 14
Hometown: Norwood, Ohio
Money made: Convenience stores
Best-known venture: United Dairy Farmers

In 1938, when Carl Lindner Jr. was 19, most milk was delivered by milkmen. Carl Lindner Sr. came up the idea of selling milk from the family's dairy farms in grocery stores, eliminating a lot of delivery costs. Carl Jr. and three siblings helped support the family by running milk routes through the Depression, then expanded the business into what would become one of the Midwest's largest chains of convenience stores, Cincinnati-based
 United Dairy Farmers. Eventually Lindner branched into insurance and real estate. From 1999 to 2006, he owned a controlling interest in the Cincinnati Reds of Major League Baseball.



Albert Ueltschi, Net worth: $1.85 billion


Age: 93
Schooling: High school diploma
Hometown: Frankfort, Ky.
Money made: Training pilots
Best-known venture: FlightSafety International

At the height of the Depression and still in high school, Albert Ueltschi opened a hamburger stand to earn money with the goal of learning to fly. Using the eatery as collateral, he bought a bi-wing airplane with $3,500 he borrowed. According to a profile in
 The Warren Buffett CEO: Secrets of the Berkshire Hathaway Managers, a book by Robert P. Miles, Ueltschi sold rides, put on airshows, and eventually flew clients around the country. In 1951 he borrowed $15,000 to start FlightSafety International, a company to train pilots. Ueltschi sold it to Warren Buffet for a reported $1.5 billion in 1996.



Oprah Winfrey, Net worth: $2.7 billion


Age: 56
Schooling: B.A., Tennessee State University
Hometown: Milwaukee
Money made: Media
Best-known venture: The Oprah Winfrey Show

Born in poverty in Mississippi and raised in Milwaukee, Oprah Winfrey moved to Nashville in 1968 to live with her father. Two years later, she won a scholarship to attend Tennessee State University. At 19 she was hired as Nashville's first African American TV correspondent. In 1983, she relocated to Chicago to take on the AM Chicago talk show later renamed
 The Oprah Winfrey Show. Her work in movies, radio, and publishing built an influential business empire. The first African American to appear on Forbes' billionaires list, Winfrey has frequently been the sole African American to make the roster.



David Murdock, Net worth: $2.7 billion


Age: 87
Schooling: Received high school diploma in 2009
Hometown: Wayne, Ohio
Money made: Real estate and acquisitions
Best-known venture: Dole Food Co.

Homeless and with little more than a few cents to his name after serving in World War II, David Murdock borrowed $900 from a Good Samaritan. He bought a diner in Detroit and flipped it for a profit of $700, then used the proceeds to buy a car to drive to Arizona. In the desert Southwest, he started building homes, starting a real estate empire that grew to include Dole Foods Co.,
 Castle — Cooke, and nearly all of the island of Lanai, Hawaii. Murdock's credo is listed on the company website: "To do the impossible, you must see the invisible."



Kirk Kerkorian, Net worth: $2.9 billion


Age: 93
Schooling: Dropped out of 8th grade
Hometown: Fresno, Calif.
Money made: Airlines, hotels, and investing
Best-known venture: Tracinda

Kerkorian started earning money for his Armenian-immigrant family at the age of 9, according to the
 Las Vegas Review-Journal. He dropped out of eighth grade to become a boxer known as "Rifle Right Kerkorian" and earned his first serious paychecks ferrying bombers across the Atlantic Ocean for Britain's Royal Air Force during World War II. He turned his flying practice into an airline and eventually went into constructing many of Las Vegas' biggest hotels. Kerkorian later branched into buying troubled companies such as automakers through Beverly Hills (Calif.)-based Tracinda. He has been Detroit's rescuing angel and menacing demon through various rounds of owning stock in General Motors (GM), Chrysler, and Ford (F). Since recession set in, Kerkorian and Tracinda have quit automotive stocks and diversified.



John Paul DeJoria, Net worth: $4.2 billion


Age: 66
Schooling: High school diploma
Hometown: Los Angeles
Money made: Hair products
Best-known venture: John Paul Mitchell Systems and Patrón Spirits

No stranger to hard times, John Paul DeJoria was born to immigrant parents and spent time in an East Los Angeles foster home. Following two years in the U.S. Navy, his odd jobs included stints as a janitor and gas station attendant. At times he was homeless. DeJoria worked his way up in hair care and cosmetic companies before joining with Paul Mitchell in 1980 to launch a hair products company, putting up an initial investment of just $700. The packaging was printed in black-and-white because color printing was too expensive.



Ralph Lauren, Net worth: $4.6 billion


Age: 71
Schooling: Dropped out of what is now Baruch College
Hometown: The Bronx
Money made: Clothing
Best-known venture: Polo Ralph Lauren

Ralph Lauren graduated high school in the Bronx, then dropped out of college to serve in the Army reserve. Next he worked as a clerk at
 Brooks Brothers, then toiled as a tie salesman—which caused him to decide that men were ready for wider, brighter designs. According to a profile in Time, Lauren sold $500,000 worth of ties in 1967, the year he started designing them for St. Louis-based Beau Brummell Cravats. The next year, he started Polo (RL) with $50,000 from clothier Norman Hilton. The company tallied $5 billion in revenue during its 2010 fiscal year.



Harold Hamm, Net worth: $5.8 billion


Age: 64
Schooling: High school diploma
Hometown: Lexington, Okla.
Money made: Oil and gas
Best-known venture: Continental Resources

Harold Hamm grew up milking cows, gathering eggs, and feeding chickens. The youngest of 13 kids born to sharecropper parents in Oklahoma, Hamm says that he hardly remembers a time when he wasn't working. "We came up working for the family unit," Hamm says. "You certainly learned quickly to do your part." At the age of 20, he bought a water pump truck to deliver drilling fluids and service drilling rigs. "That is the company that became Continental Resources (CLR)," Hamm says. "It was a very meager start." He says he raised his kids in much the same way he grew up. As his fledging company got off the ground, Hamm's wife kept the books and his daughter, starting as young as six, would answer telephones. At the end of last year, the Enid (Okla.)-based company estimated its proved reserves at 257.3 million barrels of oil, with interests in 2,317 wells. Continental Resources generated $627.7 million in revenue, according to the company's 10-K. Hamm remains at the helm. As he puts it: "I get as much excitement going to work today as I did when I was 20 years old."



Sheldon Adelson, Net worth: $14.7 billion


Age: 77
Schooling: High school diploma and some college
Hometown: Boston
Money made: Trade shows and casinos
Best-known venture: Las Vegas Sands

Sheldon Adelson grew up the son of a cab driver in Boston's rough Dorchester neighborhood. He started selling newspapers at the age of 12 and later dropped out of college to become a court reporter. According to
 The New York Times, Adelson sold toiletry kits to motels and tried mortgage brokering, then struck it rich when he founded Comdex, an annual computer trade show. He went on to build Las Vegas hotels around conventions, rather than casinos—not that he left the casinos out. At the end of 2006, The Times has estimated, Adelson's net worth had grown by about $1 million an hour for two straight years.



Larry Ellison, Net worth: $27 billion


Age: 66
Schooling: Two years, University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign; one term, University of Chicago
Hometown: Chicago
Money made: Software
Best-known venture: Oracle

Ellison was born in Brooklyn to a single mother, who asked an aunt and uncle to raise him in Chicago. According to the Academy of Achievement, Ellison dropped out of college and drove to California after his adoptive mother died. There, he held odd jobs for eight years before founding a software development company in 1977. That venture is today known as Oracle (ORCL), one of the world's largest technology companies. This year, Ellison achieved a dream in the realm of sailing when he won the America's Cup and brought the oldest trophy in international sports back to the U.S. for the first time in 15 years.

Five Things WikiLeaks' Julian Assange Told 'Time' Magazine

This is the transcript of TIME managing editor Richard Stengel's interview with WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange via Skype on Nov. 30, 2010.

RICHARD STENGEL: Hi, Mr. Assange, it's Rick Stengel. I'm the editor of TIME magazine, and thank you for joining us this evening.

JULIAN ASSANGE: You're welcome.

RS: So sorry about the technical difficulties, but I'm sure it's something you're used to. So here we go.

JA: Thousands of them.

RS: What is the effect thus far of the latest round of leaks and what effect do you hope to have from those leaks?
JA: I can see that the media scrutiny and the reaction from government are so tremendous that it actually eclipses our ability to understand it. And I think there is a new story appearing, a new, original story appearing about once every two minutes somewhere around the world. Google News has managed to index. At this stage, we can only have a feeling for what the effect is based upon just looking at what the tips of the wave are doing, moving currents under the surface. There is simply too much volume for us to even be able to see. But looking at what we can, I can see that there is a tremendous rearrangement of viewings about many different countries. And so that will result in some new kind of harmonization [variant: harm minimization]. And we can see the Israeli Prime Minister [Benjamin] Netanyahu coming out with a very interesting statement that leaders should speak in public like they do in private whenever they can. He believes that the result of this publication, which makes the sentiments of many privately held beliefs public, are promising a pretty good [indecipherable] will lead to some kind of increase in the peace process in the Middle East and particularly in relation to Iran. I just noticed today Iran has agreed to nuclear talks. Maybe that's coincidence or maybe it's coming out of this process, but it's certainly not being canceled by this process.

RS: One of the unintended consequences is the opposite effect, which is what we've seen with the Department of Defense, and even the State Department, here in the U.S., of trying to make secrets more impenetrable rather than less and trying to take precautions against what has happened from happening again in the future. How do you regard that?

JA: Well, I think that's very positive. Since 2006, we have been working along this philosophy that organizations which are abusive and need to be [in] the public eye. If their behavior is revealed to the public, they have one of two choices: one is to reform in such a way that they can be proud of their endeavors, and proud to display them to the public. Or the other is to lock down internally and to balkanize, and as a result, of course, cease to be as efficient as they were. To me, that is a very good outcome, because organizations can either be efficient, open and honest, or they can be closed, conspiratorial and inefficient.
RS: Are there any instances [in] diplomacy or global affairs in which you see secrecy as necessary and as an asset?

JA: Yes, of course. We keep secret the identity of our sources, as an example, [and] take great pains to do it. So secrecy is important for many things but shouldn't be used to cover up abuses, which leads us to the question of who decides and who is responsible. It shouldn't really be that people are thinking about, Should something be secret? I would rather it be thought, Who has a responsibility to keep certain things secret? And, Who has a responsibility to bring matters to the public? And those responsibilities fall on different players. And it is our responsibility to bring matters to the public.

RS: You mention the public. Do you believe the American public in this particular instance was either dissatisfied or unhappy with the way the U.S. government was conducting diplomacy, so that you felt compelled to expose it to them? Because it seems to me that the public is reacting negatively to a lot of this exposure of diplomatic secrets that they presumably feel were actually in their interest.

JA: Well, I think the response by the American public has been very favorable to our endeavor. In fact, I think the State Department is going to have a hard time of it trying to spin this. It's one thing to tap into [audio lost]. It's one thing to talk about the need to protect this image of the innocent young soldier; it's another thing to talk about how diplomats are hard done by when they find their very privileged position in life undermined by having their lies revealed. And it doesn't seem to me that there is grass-roots, broad support for the behavior of diplomats, say, stealing [inaudible] DNA. That's just something that doesn't resonate well with the average person.

RS: And I know you've e-mailed about this, but what is your reaction to Secretary [Hillary] Clinton's declaration that you've put lives in jeopardy and now the apparent attempts by the U.S. Justice Department to prosecute you? What is your reaction to that? And have you committed any crimes that they should be prosecuting you for?

JA: Well, this sort of nonsense about lives being put in jeopardy is trotted out every time a big military or intelligence organization is exposed by the press. It's nothing new, and it's not an exclusively American phenomenon by an means. It goes back at least 50 years, and in extremely different forms hundreds of years before that, so that sort of reactionary sentiment is equally expected. We get that on nearly every post that we do. However, this organization in its four years of publishing history — we don't need to speculate, it has a history — has never caused an individual, as far as we can determine or as far anyone else can determine, to come to any sort of physical harm or to be wrongly imprisoned and so on. That is a record compared to the organizations that we are trying to expose who have literally been involved in the deaths of hundreds or thousands or, potentially over the course of many years, millions.

Joke Tengah Malam

• Cara membuat cewe bahagia (untuk cowo) : peluk dia, cium dia, belai dia, rayu dia, perhatiin dia, beliin kado………….Cara membuat cowo bahagia (untuk cewe) : cukup lepaskan semua bajumu saja

• Anda Penjaga kuburan? Cobalah iklan berikut ini : SUSAH BERNAFAS? HUBUNGI KAMI KAMI MELAYANI: -PETI MATI -TERSEDIA PAKET PLUSPLUS *KARANGAN BUNGA *DAN KOSTUM KIRIM REG MAKAM KIRIM KE: KUBURAN “ANDA TEWAS, KAMI PUAS”

• Money Is Not Everything, But No Money Everything is Nothing

• Seks di luar pernikahan itu bagaikan kentut, kalo ditahan bakal sakit perut, tapi kalo di lepas malu menjemput!!

• Tiga Wanita di interogasi di pintu surga. Wanita 1 : Saya menjaga kesucian saya sampai saat ini. Malaikat : Kasih dia kunci surga. Wanita 2 : Saya menjaga kesucian saya sampai saya menikah. Malaikat : Kasih dia kunci surga. Wanita 3 : Saya sudah menjual kesucian saya sewaktu SMU, sekarang saya adalah wanita penghibur high class. Malaikat : Kasih dia kunci kamar saya

• sop buntut itu gak enak buntutnya karena musti bayar

• Teori logis kenapa wanita lebih memilih kecantikan daripada kepintaran : karena jumlah cowo bodoh lebih banyak dari cowo buta

• Andai Adam dan Hawa orang Tionghoa, mungkin mereka tidak akan diusir dari surga, karena kemungkinan besar apelnya dijual dan ularnya dijadiin sop

• Cara terbaik untuk mengingat ulang tahun pacar atau istri kita adalah dengan melupakannya sekaliii saja

• Sarjana – “jebolan mana?” cewe hamil – “jebolan siapa?”

• Heh! kamu! Jangan deket2 tong sampah! Saya gak bisa membedakan mana yang sampah mana yang bukan!

• Tali beha itu lucu ya?? kalo ditutup bisa mengencangkan 2 buah benda, tapi kalo dibuka bisa mengencangkan satu benda

• Pelanggan Yth. Masa aktif hidup anda akan segera habis, saldo dosa anda sudah melewati batas. Segera isi ulang iman anda di rumah ibadah terdekat sebelum nyawa anda di blokir.

• Seorang kanibal dan anaknya sedang pergi berburu manusia akhirnya menemukan seorang wanita cantik, sexy, memakai tank top yang kelihatan udel dan belahan dadanya. Jadi….. Anak :Ayah, ayo kita bawa dia pulang untuk dijadikan makan malam! Ayah : Saya mempunyai ide yang lebih baik, nak..ayo dia kita bawa pulang dia dan kita makan ibumu

• Seorang istri berkata kepada suaminya: “Jon, kamu sebaiknya membantu anakmu mengerjakan pekerjaan rumahnya sekarang, mumpung kamu masih mampu mengajarinya. Tahun depan sudah susah loh, dia sudah akan ada di kelas 4 SD, aku yakin kamu tidak akan mampu mengajarinya lagi nanti.”

• Istri : Sayang..make up ini buat aku keliatan jelek ga??? Suami : Nggak….mukamu itu yang membuatmu jelek

• Cowo: Kamu ingin bermain sulap? Cewe: Sulap itu apa sih? Cowo : Sulap itu adalah kita ke nite club, kita ngobrol,kita minum,kita make love lalu saya ngilang

• Happy Wife…Happy Life…

• Kau akan kehilangan uang kalau kau mengejar wanita, tetapi kau tidak akan kehilangan wanita kalau mengejar uang

• sekuat apapun cowo…. setegar apapun seorang cewe… sewaktu saat pasti akan meneteskan air mata….. karena satu masalah yaitu…. kelilipan….

• Istri senantiasa ingin diingat hari ulangtahunnya tanpa diingat umurnya, tetapi para suami selalu ingat umur istrinya tanpa pernah ingat hari ulang tahunnya

• ada 3 sahabat bernama: Tole, Mira dan Konan. suatu hari tole lagi manjat pohon , konan lagi mancing , n mira lagi baca buku…. tiba2 tole jatuh dari pohon , si mira langsung teriak: KON…TOLE JATUH!!!!

• Katanya Tuhan menciptakan Hawa untuk menemani Adam, tapi kenapa sekarang Adam juga bisa berpasangan dengan Adam?


• Udin yang sudah 2 hari tidak pulang dari warnet, memutuskan untuk pulang juga. Tepat di pintu keluar ia mendorong pintu tersebut sekuat tenaga, anehnya pintu tidak bergeming sedikitpun. Setelah mendorong berkali-kali dengan sekuat tenaga, akhirnya ia kecapean lalu marah-marah sama operator warnet..”WARNET GEMBEL BANGET!!! PINTU RUSAK GAK DIBENERIN!!” si operator emosi,”Itu tulisannya TARIK bego”

• Seorang cowo mendonorkan darahnya kepada pacarnya yang terkena musibah kecelakaan. Ketika hubungan mereka putus, cowo yang koret itu kemudian meminta darahnya kembal. Pacarnya yang sebel malah melempar pembalut ke muka si cowo dan berkata, “Nih! Gue cicil per bulan!!

• Satu satu cakepnya wajahmu, dua dua, anggun juga kaya, tiga-tiga banyak penggemarnya, satu dua tiga fitnah semuanya…..

• Ada seorang petinggi agama yg mpunyai kebiasaan buruk mengumpat kata “Ngehek” setiap kali bola golf yang dipukulnya tdk masuk ke dalam lobang. Merasa berdosa, si petinggi agama bersumpah akan tersambar petir bila ia mengumpat lagi. Namun, pada pukulan berikutnya ia gagal lagi dan spontan berteriak “NGEHEK!!”….tidak lama terdengar sambaran petir..namun si petinggi agama tidak apa2…lalu terdengarlah suara dari langit..”NGEHEK”

• Pacar dan istri itu ibarat alat musik yang dapat mengeluarkan suara-suara merdu yang menenangkan hati selama kita tidak memainkan alat musik yang lainnya.

• Aku tidak takut dipelototi oleh cowo botak, brewokan, tinggi gede, sangar,tatoan….aku lebih takut dikedipin dan didadahin genit oleh dia

• Istri : Dulu banyak cowok yang datang melamarku, tapi aku tolak semua kecuali kamu. Suami : Sama, dulu banyak cewek yang aku lamar, tapi semua nolak kecuali kamu.

• Cinta itu seperti makan di restoran mewah,kita pasti akan puas dengan segala servis dan hidangan yang disediakan. Namun pada akhirnya kita juga tetap harus membayar semua itu dengan jumlah yang dapat membuat kantong bolong

• Ternyata sumber mata air mineral dan ASI itu sama, yaitu dari pegunungan

• Perbedaan definisi panik,stress dan depresi adalah kalau istri hamil itu panik , kalau selingkuhan hamil itu stress……nah, kalau depresi itu adalah jika dua-duanya hamil

• Keboku ada 5….. rupa2 warnanya…. hijau, kuning kelabu… merahmuda dan biru…. keboku hilang empat… door… hatiku sangat kacau… keboku tinggal satu.. mukanya kayak kamu….

• Istri yang sempurna harus : 1. Cantik 2.Setia 3.Jujur 4.Pengertian 5.Tidak saling mengenal satu sama lain

• Sekurus dan secantik apapun, wanita selalu merasa dirinya gemuk dan jelek, tetapi sebotak dan segendut apapun pria tetap merasa dirinya kereeenn…